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The Comeback

The Final Comeback Has Started!

The ComebackThe final comeback started on May 6th, 2O13. Just 25 days ago I finally “made a decision” to start to do what is needed to take my body on a journey to the weight I was born to be. I don’t know exactly what that is, but I have an idea of the range it’s in. I have started eating and moving in ways that will take me to that weight range. I am no where near that weight right now because I have abused my body with poor food choices, binging and the lowest movement [no fitness] I have ever done or not done.

This is called “the final comeback” because I never want to do this again. I will do this honesty, hard work and patience. I will set goals, share my story, eat clean, workout and all the other little things that it will take to live, share and inspire a lifestyle of overall physical health.

What’s even more important than “losing weight” and “looking better”?

Igniting the dreams, ideas and true potential of my brain and what it can help me do. You see every other time I have juiced, dieted and fasted I have started to feel better mentally and usually other areas of my life start to run much smoother. Then I add in some working out at the gym building muscle and just overall increasing my “movement” and “activity levels” an even bigger “shift” starts to happen…. business picks up, I sleep better, I begin goal setting and meeting new people and then…. I slowly stop… I start feeling better, nope not this time.

AverageWhy stop when things start going well? what if I took it further than I ever have with clean eating and consistant fitness?. It still comes back to what I’ve written in the “about” section and many other blogs here. I want a shift in my business, I want my relationship to reach higher levels and my partner to have access to the “best me” and more than anything my position as a Father/Leader/Coach to my 2 kids needs to be at the “HIGHEST” Levels. I am an example physically and mentally to them each and every day now and I am doing a great job. So when “you know, what I know” I can offer much more  when I am at “the weight i was born to be” and doing the fitness and activities i am capable of. Not talk about it… BE IT!

Why would I question either of my kids about getting a “C” in Math when they are capable of an A ? Sounds a little funny coming from a man who has been living as “C-Level life” versus an “A-Level life” which I have always been capable of. ..always….back to a “Choice”, a “Decision”

I am on the right path and will write about it here. Keep coming back.

ageless abs | 6 pack abs

What’s The Hidden Payoff?

I have entered into a online program called Ageless Abs by Scott Colby. Today Scott asked the group to answer these questions and share with our partners. Well… here you go.. you are all my partners.

“1. List 3 Things you want to change about your body.”

1. Lower overall Fat% with focus on taking off Belly Fat

2. Strengthen Core and improve Posture & lower back

3. Flexibility


“2. Why is this so important to you? What is your Reason?”

I can say what I want to my children, I can make promises to my wife and I can tell myself that grandkids are years and years away… the bottom line is my kids do what I do more now than ever. I can give them a life full of knowledge in the areas of fitness and healthy eating by getting honest with myself and my physical situation. With me 40 and them 6 & 8 years old this is the Time, it’s crucial right now in every way. In the core of my soul I want to live life more FULL OUT then I ever have before… take bigger chances and be the best I can be as a Husband, Father and Friend to people I come in contact with and I know it’s not possible in the physical shape I am in right now. I need, want and will do what it takes to get into the best shape of my life. Like a boat leaving waves behind its motor…I want to leave waves of inspiration as I walk through people’s lives. My biggest breakthrough’s are on the other side of this program and this mission I speak of. Family, Money, Faith, Fitness, Fun and more are all supposed to be impossible to balance well I am tired of that story… I am making a new one.

“3. IDENTIFY: List the habits or actions that have contributed to why your body is the way it is today.” (What are you doing right now that allows you to keep this body?)

a) Sleep – I do not sleep enough. Never have. Always been a night-owl – 5.5-6hrs is the norm. I am not sure what 8 hrs for 2-4 weeks would do for my system. This is an area I need to test and be open too!

b) Binge Eating – Taking feelings I am not sure what to do with and feeding the cravings with sugar and or bad carbs – I know what doesn’t go well inside my body and yet I sink into denial thinking tomorrow is the answer when I know or I am learning that being “present” , taking a deep breath and “thinking” can allow me to make a better decision. “One Day At A Time” and sometimes 10 minutes at a time as they say in the Recovery movement.

c) Fitness – Not taking fitness serious over the long term. Like air, water and shelter my body craves exercise. I always feel better after and yet have ignored the true benefits of the endorphins being released and that bonus of “feeling good” and of course most of all the spill over effect of attitude and positive energy.

d) Time Management – Food preparation. Eating fast and choosing a food out convenience instead of what’s right for my body. Making time for my workouts and getting creative with different ideas that will hold my interest.

“4. List 3 things you could do right now that will make a difference today.” (an action, no matter how small, that will bring you closer to your goal).

1. Sleep an extra hour tonight – (one night at a time)

2. Review my goals so when I go to bed I align thinking with my long term vision.

3. Take mini-workout – leave laptop and do 2-4 sets of push-ups

“5. List at least 2 things that you are giving up by not being more fit or having a body you can be happy in.”

1.- Avoiding situations and outings because of how I feel about my appearance.

2. BIG ONE – Not taking the serious JUMP as an entrepreneur in my business – still some lack in confidence, fear of failure – yes I do feel if I was physically fit, stronger and confident I would be closer to doing what deep down I am here to do.

“What is it costing you?”

1. True Health

2. More Stress, Patience.

3. Freedom – When I dive into what I love to do full time on my own there will be more balance and opportunity for the right amount of money versus time design. More time to be present for my wife and my children.

4. Being the Best Husband, Father, Brother, Friend…

5. Money – many ways, many thousands of dollars in my honest opinion.

(If you’re really ambitious and want some extra credit, try tackling this one as well: What do you gain by keeping things the way they are? What’s the hidden payoff?)

The hidden payoff is that I get to be/stay “middle class” that’s right.. a regular guy, driving the regular car, visiting family when I am not busy, 1 vacation a year, talk about old times instead of now time. I do not mean monetary middle class…. I mean I never really have to say I tried to live a WORLD CLASS LIFE everyday from the moment I woke up until I laid down at night. There is a layer of fat around my belly and core that is like a straight jacket… I know that underneath this jacket is the Life I Was Born To Live. My playing small and safe in this world is not serving my kids, family or God.

Facing The Giants - death Crawl scene

Determination

Determination From my Vacation in Las Vegas 3 weeks ago to my KettleWorx workout tonight I really have not let up. We had some great meals in Vegas and although I allow myself 1 meal or so per week where I eat outside the lines… I never lose site of my goals.

Goals - Goal Setting

Do You Have Goals Right Now?

DGoals Booko you have Goals right now? Are they actually written down, being tracked and reviewed in some form? Are you living the life you you want in the areas of fitness and nutrition? What about your dream job, more free time or living debt free?

Maybe one action is related to the other… denial is a slow time stealing inside-spiritual-killer. I know…I hit a wall a couple months ago in the “I’m Fat” dept, started this blog including a small goals section and in my office wrote down a list of goals in all the areas of my life from Relationship with my spouse and children to spiritual and career. I have looked at my goals daily, thought about them and began to become more disciplined through Mental Toughness on wanting to live this life I “wrote” down instead of the “middle of the road – I’ve given up – I’ll just wear black clothes and jogging pants” Life!

Today I am 20 pounds lighter physically and 100 pounds lighter mentally then 2 months ago ! Things are happening in all areas… some challenging and some seem so deserved. There is more available to me if I continue this path… Goal setting does work…try journals from the dollar store or splurge at Chapters for a nice one… just write something down ..even if it seems like a dream. Start the process. Heading towards the WEIGHT YOU WERE BORN TO BE will open up DOORS you haven’t looked through in years. GO FOR IT!

I used to listen to Zig Ziglar years ago while in sales and yes he sounds a little like a preacher, kinda funny but I love his message and delivery….

What is 1 Goal you have right now in your head that would be tops on your list? Why?

Fat | Being Fat

The Costs of Being Fat

I had a call with Scott Colby aka “The Abs Expert” last week. We talked about belly fat and his questions brought some interesting answers and the one that caught both our attention was my answer that had me listing out the “costs” of being fat or having belly fat. Not exactly monetary costs although there are some… but more along the “bigger picture” costs…

1. Being an EXAMPLE of health, fitness and nutrition for my kids: Don’t tell them, Show them! My children will never remember me at this weight. They will know me as someone who doesn’t over eat and a dad who always is ready to be active in their lives of sports activities. COST: stay fat and children see it as acceptable, they will lack discipline and true confidence of well being. I lose the opportunity of seeing them being all they can be if I don’t offer them the tools and ideals to emulate.

2. Staying True to your spouse: True? Yes I think the challenges of rich or poor, good times and bad all have a better chance of working themselves out if you are “the best you can be” in the areas of physical appearance and vitality. It is unfair even for one spouse to add on weight and then give up with no efforts at maintaining a “fit” appearance. Aside from getting ill and not living a long life possibly with your mate it often turns into 2 people letting themselves go which can cause issues with confidence, resentment, reclusive behavior and a list of  other side-effects in the areas of intimacy and sex. You cannot sit around waiting for the other to “get into shape” or to accept you as a fat person who is not at least willing to “try” to return to that fighting weight you were the day you got married. COST: huge relationship challenges and downsides if 1 or both partners get fat. Anger bubbles up and things happen that wouldn’t normally happen if you were tight, toned, fit and emotionally available to each other versus being stuck inside the clutches of yo-yo diet syndromes, nervous visits to the Doctor and wondering if things are going to work out. the mind can run away on you during insecurity.

3.  Your Real Career: If you ever wanted to land that job that didn’t feel like work, being in shape, fit and confident can sure assist with opportunity. It has taken me over 15 years to be doing something that doesn’t feel like work. Most of what I do today I would do for free if I did not need money. It’s not like playing Golf, Hockey or going to concerts for a living… but it is the closest I have ever come to that. Now I arrived here Fat. The bonus is that I realized that in order to really explode my business into a place where I work less and still earn a decent living I need to be an Athlete! The physical and mental health ideals I am shooting for will allow me to tap into the confidence, risk-taking ideas and language sets that are needed to complete my vision boards and bucket lists that include living an extraordinary life with my wife and 2 children. COST : This area here has cost me thousands of dollars as I “settled” many times for jobs that required only 30-40% of my attention span… I didn’t want the challenges as “fear” was close by all the time while I packed on another 5 pounds in the fat race. So my salary, bonuses or opportunities never seemed to add up to my true ability until recently. Yes my weight had a part in this.

Excuses Be GoneI feel that the 3 things I mention above can work together and be at their absolute strongest when in sync. If I give up one area so that I can get things going well in another it never seems to pan out. This myth of “its tuff to balance” is a paradigm in a sense… “We are what we think about all day long”…is one of the most profound quotes of our time and I am putting efforts in a little each day with plans, dreams, goals and self talk to go along with it… World class of course… and it’s working…at it’s own pace. It is not instant…. I am learning patience  and I am “causing” momentum and alot of my successes so far including some important breakthroughs have shown up because of my dedication to better nutrition and sticking to my fitness commitment. It starts on the inside.

What would your life look like today if you were that exact weight you knew you were born to be?

Obviously people who are in good shape all don’t have perfect careers and relationships…etc.. but living in the City of FAT or the Town of In-Activeness for a number of years… I would say drops your chances of living a life FULL ON! Make the shift! It is amazing once you begin to take the BIG BACK PACK of DENIAL off and refocus on “Possibilities”

Synchronicity_Logo

It’s Synchronicity not Coincidence

Wayne Dyer

Wayne Dyer

I remember listening to Wayne Dyer years ago talk about Synchronicity versus Coincidence. What he spoke of was living with “higher awareness”.  Understanding that you are so called “in the zone” as sports people say… everything seems to come together… not just a couple of things but many things. I remember he pointed out that when you reach this level of “vibration” that people tend to gravitate towards you and you begin to “notice”  these things happening as if it was all planned out. The “Noticer” (you) begins to see things almost before they happen and as you get in tune with it you can almost affect or complete these instances to make sure they do happen.

Higher Awareness people know that these are NOT coincidences… rather that they are experiencing  Synchronicity.  It’s happened to me a number of times over the past 4 weeks… sometimes small things but they are there and I am open to them. Some of these things are happening to you now but many of us don’t notice them. As you do and feed off of them they begin to show up more and more.

My wife sent me my Horoscope today which reminded me of this path

AQUARIUS (January 20-February 18)

Getting into shape or maintaining the one you’ve got is easier than usual this month, thanks to the solar eclipse’s activation of your health zone. A new diet or fitness routine started just after the 11th has ‘success’ written all over it, and there’s a good chance it will become part of your life in the long term! Now that your ruler Uranus has just entered a brand new sign (trailblazing Aries), after having been in Pisces for the last six years, you’re in the throes of redefining yourself on other levels as well.

Yes I am redefining, renovating and open to all that is mine. I will write about more synchronicity moments as they unfold.

Excuses not to do things

Maybe You Are Just Making Excuses

It’s one thing to see someone else in denial that you love. You want to help them, fix them and make things better. What about you? What about leading by example. I’ve studied self development on and off for 20 years. My father was doing it for as long as I can remember. So I was lucky to pick up this habit. Plus moving into a career in Sales I was told I needed a positive attitude, I needed to set goals, repetition is the mother of skill they told me…. from Tony Robbins to Wayne Dyer and all kinds of others in-between… I immersed myself at times with these messages and teachers… and many situations were overcome with confidence that spilled over from this connection to these books, seminars and CD programs.

Well stopping that connection to those activities is like stopping going to the gym or eating properly… its a slow but steady slide back to negative thoughts and average behaviors. These last 4 weeks I jumped off the deep end into the pool of “Anythings Possible” again and it has been beyond refreshing.

For some people who struggle in life and don’t have the tools or were never even shown “the way” as I was it can be pretty tough unless they are vigilant in their search for “breakthroughs”. Now for myself, I know what works and have experienced success with coaching and mental toughness many times but somehow I got a little lost over the past 5-7 years. Knowing what to do and not doing it is almost insanity, major denial and living a life of excuses.

So I have a couple of CD programs I carry with me now from my home office to the car and I am listening non stop…. like a sponge, I am soaking it all in. I am speaking a different language now in my head and out loud. I am trying to help others as I help myself. There is something bigger here for me and I deserve it as do those around me. I’ve been goal setting and even dug out a Michael Jordan book that was bought for me like 4 years ago. Although I am not a sports nut…I do like most sports and recently with my son playing hockey and soccer I am taking on more interest and it feels good. This is the life I was meant to live.

Athletes like Michael Jordan, Wayne Gretzky and Bobby Orr I love to read about… their Drive, Commitment and Determination to succeed at winning or setting records in their field. wow! It makes me want to run and humbles me largely in the “effort dept”. I started watching Michael Jordan videos on youtube one night last week and got lost for 45 minutes. Why didn’t I watch him more when he played? I couldn’t believe what I was seeing… This is the type of motivation I like… it challenges me mentally. Makes me want to push and explore my limits/beliefs as a person in the areas of being an athlete, as a father, as a husband, brother and friend. At 40 I may not be going into professional sports anytime soon… but what is stopping me from putting the world-class efforts into the areas I listed in the previous sentence? What would my/your life look like if I/we practiced like Jordan and were as dedicated as Terry Fox to being in shape and and living life FULL OUT !!!!

unstoppable

My Daughter, The Unstoppable!

Today has been another day where I went beyond where I expected to be with fitness and ended off with a special opportunity for me to share some positive talk with my 8 year old daughter.

Kettleworx DVDMy son and I went to the basement to do our Day 2 of the 100 Push Ups Challenge. He logs us in on my iPhone App and we ended up at 68 total push ups after 5 sets. Now my wife had asked if I would join her for a “Kettle Bell” workout. I said sure since we have the (dusty) “KettleWorx” DVD set and figured some weights would be good. Even the kids joined in a little but soon got tired. Both my wife and I were hanging on for dear life towards the end… What a sweat. Kettleworx is a 6 week program and it appears my wife wants to go at it …so this is yet another chance to get a different type of exercise in the mix for me. Of course working with someone else always adds that extra drive/accountability too.

After this was over and the kids were sent to bed my daughter came back downstairs to ask if she could talk to me about something…she was upset. She told me some girls were bullying her or more like not including her for a portion of their school trip. This has gone on before of course at her age various friends trade secrets & friendships on a weekly basis. So I brought her close to me and asked her if she scored good marks in school? Yes she said…then I asked her if she was good at Piano, Gymnastics and listened to her parents (usually) and she said yes again.. I continued to point out her many strong points and that we (her family) were her friends. These girls just chose to do this to her just for today…I also mentioned that being alone was okay sometimes, that she didn’t always have to have a girlfriend beside her. I ended off by asking her what they could have possibly been talking about if she was good at so many things, had us as her friends and was a confident 8 year old girl?  She just looked straight ahead…I followed that up with “it doesn’t really matter”

Unstoppable Me - Wayne Dyer - Childrens Book

After this… I was almost blown away when she asked if we could make a little “CARD” for her to carry around that she could write on that she was Unstoppable ! I guess I must have mentioned something in passing about my Goal setting card I had made up I am not sure. I know where she got the Unstoppable…it is from a Wayne Dyer book written for kids called Unstoppable Me!: 10 Ways to Soar Through Life We have this book and the others he has done for children. I even have this book as an APP on my iPhone.

So since I just did goal setting the other night for myself on one of these cards I brought my daughter to up to my office and we read over some parts of the book to help her get an idea what she would write on her card before I laminated it. It was pretty cool to see her mood and demeanor transform right there while “creativity” happened. A tool for her to use or maybe this was just her first lesson in “self talk” and positive programming?

This same path in which my father introduced me to, started with an introduction to the Godfather of Motivation… Dr. Wayne Dyer. This didn’t happen until I was about 20…but boy his books have changed my life forever. My daughter picked something out of the children’s book and then asked what “persistance” was since it was one of the chapters. I showed her this blog and explained that just last night I wrote about Persisting. I gave her an example of herself doing this and here is what she came up with for her carry around positive card.

The Unstoppable Me!

My 8 Year Old Daughter’s Goal Card